what’s on the needles: park fun edition

IMG_3993IMG_3996IMG_4010IMG_4012IMG_4002I admit to being the sort of mama who doesn’t always enjoy going to the park.  I feel like getting ready to watch the kids play is too much effort.  I’d much rather stay in me pj’s and be barefooted while knitting inside and glancing out the window.   The thing about city life id that it’s not all about me, right?  I kids LOVE the park and so I must oblige them as often as possible.  This truly keeps us all sane.  Cabin fever is a frequent ailment these days.

I’m trying to be better.  Better at self-sacrifice, effort when I’m tired, letting them be kids, ignoring the fact that out seven brushes are never to be found, better at calm.  I’m attempting to train into my heart more slow, more thankfulness, more heart swelling moments of pleasure. More enjoyment.

After all there is always something to enjoy.

This day I enjoyed this:

Feeling proud of Josie Bean for all the physical accomplishments she had been though.  I’m proud of her for simply being able to ride her bike.

I feel happy to see the kids playing with friends at the park, and friends who share their super fun Christmas gifts such as hover boards.

I found excitement in watching a bunch of neighborhood kids use their imaginations.

I was surprised and joyful to watch my boys playing basketball with each other when they could’ve played with someone else.  They preferred each other!

I felt relaxed knitting in the warmth of the winter sun this beautiful pattern.  I look forward to wrapping up in this knit so very much.

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moving to the city

If you haven’t been here long, you my not know. I’ll share with you a not-so-secret.  I’m a planner.  I love things in my head being organized and thought out well.  I like to have a paper planner.  Old school style.  We have moved 7 previous times in 15 years with lots of time and help and organized lists, labeled boxed by room and most important contents, all utilities changed ahead of time ect.  This time was much different.

Though we had planned on moving for a few months, I was in school and couldn’t even consider looking at a box until I graduated.  So, we moved in two weeks.  Two weeks from nothing packed to sleeping in a new home.  I had to let lots of things go.

Today is our fifth day living in our new house in the city.  Guess what?  I still have all the utilities on at the old house.  That’s right.  Everything’s a mess.  Well, to me anyways.  I tried to take care of the rest of the list I had made today, but it’s in Nick;s name, so he has to do it.

It’s out of my hands.

I’m learning that most things are nowadays.  It’s so much a bad thing.

I am forced to relinquish control over my life in small details, and big ones as well.  This causes me to have to make peace with where I am and who really is in charge.

Despite my efforts to have every details thought and planned, I make a mess that only God can clean up.

I hadn’t looked at my planner or a calendar for a week. I forgot about appointments that inconvenienced a certain person…that made me feel awful.

I got sick right at moving time.

Josie had a urgent medical appoint I had to drive 1.5 hours to (she’s going to be fine), Isabel had to be taken to the urgent care and ER (She will also be fine), and I felt like giving up the ghost by the end of it all.

I’m not truly in control.  There are things I forget due to my human mind, events that you are unable foresee, and it ‘s hard predict how you will feel or how much energy you’ll have.

It’s not all about me or my plans and schedule.  Sometimes it’s about forgetting all that and just enjoying a moment in time.  Rest when you are forced to rest.  Be made to train your high-strung pup who is terrified of all the houses in the city. Just let it go.

Me.  I need to let go and just enjoying moving to the city.